Tuesday, September 15, 2009

A weekend of buses, hicks and other stuff

I left Ashna's party at 11:30PM. Nick had offered to let me stay at his place but I didn't want to interrupt the privacy that he apparently didn't need but should have with this new female person that was clinging to his lips with hers. Needless to say, Ashna and myself were quite proud of him/ joyous that something finally happened for him, and that the something wasn't of the crazy variety. Eva, or as this something went by, is probably best described in this conversation with a Mr. Ant. Jones:

Me
She's very...
(at a loss for words)
Feitelian

Ant. Jones
Yea, but, like, even more so

This, of course, means that they'll, knock on wood, get along together great.

However, I digress, because Nick's new girlfriend is not the subject of the story. So going back to what I was saying, I decided to leave the bar at 11:30PM with only one drink in me so I could get out of Williamsburg "Hipstersville" Brooklyn and over to Port Authority in time to catch the last bus home to Bloomfield.

I was looking forward to being home after a trip to decently borderline very rural Connecticut to visit/assist good friend Matthew Troy, who had organized an event for his town's fire department called The Muster. I was on hand to operate his EX-3, which is a very nice camera, but SxS cards are quite expensive and the SD to SxS adapters are quite finicky, so use with caution. (BTW, I'm my own damn DIT!!!)

This weekend in CT involved several trips to the Hebron Harvest Fair where we bore witness to many glorious displays of redneckery including, but not limited to:

Oxen Pulls
Tractor Pulls
Modified Tractor Pulls
Demolition Derby
Dock Dogs

Yes, what better way to show your neighbor you're better than them by getting your dog to jump further than their dog... also getting your Ox/horse/tractor to pull more weight further than their ox/horse/tractor.

Aside from all of the wonderful sights seen at the fair, I learned that country folk are really bitter with city folk, as best outlined in this conversation below:

Me
Hey Matt, do you have a wet-nap
or anything like that?

Matt
Why, what happened?

Me
Nothing, my hand's just muddy.

Lady
It's just mud! you'll live, city
boy!

Me
I know that, I'd just rather not touch
Matt's $10,000 camera with my
grimy-ass hands

Lady
There's plenty of water around, just stick
your hand out in the rain!

Yes, the conversation did go like that, and yes, I know she was just teasing, but a noteworthy conversation none the less.

So after a fun time filled with freshly made donuts, fried dough and locally produced milk. (Not to forget the junk cars crashing into each other) my only regret laid in my decision to leave my cowboy hat at home.

A two or three-hour bus ride later landed me back in Manhattan's Port Authority, and from there to Ashna's party. This was a legitimate bus, as opposed to my bus ride there which was a coach van to some random street in Hartford. Additionally, the van was rather late in picking me up and even later in dropping me off and made entirely complete with our grumpy Chinese driver.

I left Ashna's party, as mentioned before, at 11:30PM to catch the last bus to Bloomfield at 12:45AM, which may seem a little extreme, but trust me, it's not. I got back to Port Authority at 12:30AM, just in time to discover that all the ticket windows had just closed (no shitting, they close at 12:30AM). However, a second discovery was made: despite the fact that the sign for the bus says to purchase tickets at a ticket window beforehand, you can actually purchase tickets on the bus.

The trip home was fast. I was at my desired stop in almost 20 minutes, but not before the guy in front of me blew chunks all over the seat next to him.


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